Wednesday, September 28, 2011

sad.

Do you ever do something that you wish you could take back?? It's like you have 10 seconds of stupidity and then everything changes.

That's how I feel right now. I'm fighting back tears every second and am weighed down with enormous guilt.

In other news, I am attempting going 3.2 miles a little more regularly and am feeling good. My legs get tired quicker than my breathing now which feels really nice to not be gasping for air.

I'm hoping at my next Dr. Appointment on Monday, she'll say that I can RUN. Like, go an entire mile without stopping.

I also hope that this horrible feeling will pass soon. I hate being stupid. I feel like a complete failure.

Monday, September 19, 2011

Marathon Medal

I'm a mixture of bummed and excited about the marathon that I don't get to do this year/DO get to do next year.

Why?

Because I found out that the medal they give out is also a BELT BUCKLE!!!


How COOL is that?! I CAN actually wear my medal around and not look like I'm bragging about my race (but of course I am). But in a belt buckle?? Those are totally socially acceptable.

I can't WAIT until November 2012. Belt Buckle time.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Singing in the rain

Today is the second day in a row there has been rain in our area. For the first time in 70 days. Nights are hitting the 60's. For the first time in 70 days.

I couldn't resist doing a walk/jog in the rain tonight.

I loved:

-the pitter patter of rain on the pavement
-the steam rising from the road when car headlights gave me a good view
-the lightening show in the sky
-cold rain dripping down my face and soaking my hair
-rumbling in the sky to go with the lightening
-my shoes squishing with each step
-the sound of my footsteps on the ground
-the bathroom at mile 1.2 to ease my bladder (this baby is making thing difficult)
-cars passing me showering my lower legs with a spray of water.

I've missed rain SO much! I've missed cool weather SO much.

I have such a good time that I sang along with my music with no care to who heard me. (and that's saying something for this tine-deaf girl!)

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

I have a dream...

I don't know if it's because my raging hormones are making me think things that are unrealistic,

OR if it's because I'm being told what I can and cannot do it's making me think, "I'll SHOW YOU!"

OR if it's because having children kills brain cells (I don't have a lot left!)

But my dream/goal/desire is to run a sub 2-hour half marathon.


My ONLY half marathon I did in 2 hours and 11 minutes with 8 weeks of training taking me from 3 miles to 10 miles for the first time in my life.

I did NO speed work. I was only working on endurance and I remember at the race my body being done at about 9.5 miles. I barely struggled to hang on until the end and I was DONE. My comfortable pace during most of the race was a 9:40 minute mile (I just couldn't hold it at the end) which would give me a 2:06 half. I need to run a 9:09 minute mile for 13.1 miles to squeak under 2 hours.


I REALLY think I can do this. It'll be hard. It'll take a lot of training. Lots of speedwork. 

I WILL go a sub-2.
So let it be written.
So let it be done.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

biking

This is me at 22 weeks baby!! Smack dab in the middle of my 6th month of preggo-ness.


I know, I know:
"you don't even look pregnant!"
"where are you hiding it?"
"are you SURE there is a baby in there?"

I've heard it ALL. And trust me. There is a baby in there. He kicks all the time, those shorts I'm wearing are completely unbuttoned and unzipped and held up by a bella band.

This morning I went on my weekly bike ride. I am walking/jogging (but mostly walking) 2.5 - 3 miles about 4 days a week and I'm trying to squeeze in a bike ride on saturdays. The ride I did 3 weeks ago was horrendous!!! I barely made it 8 miles and that's only because I forgot to bring my phone with me. If I had had it with me, I would have called Dave to pick me up. THAT'S how bad it was. (believe you me, I've never forgotten my phone since!)
And then I squeaked out 10 miles 2 weeks ago, and last week I got 12 miles (but the last 3.5 were with family at 7 mph).
THIS week, I was determined to go 14. I felt GREAT for the first 8 or 9 miles, cruising at my usual 17-18 mph and then my energy tanked. Big time. I just didn't feel good anymore and started barely moving at 11 mph. I cut across my "cheat" bridge and cut my ride short by 1.5 miles. I made it 12.4 and my legs felt like jello for an hour after that.

Please tell me this is because I'm pregnant. Please tell me that I'm not really that wussy. Please tell me that it will take a month TOPS to feel like myself again after this baby is born.

The good news? This is the ONLY pregnancy (#4 baby - if you haven't been keeping track) that I've actually attempted to exercise all the way through. And even though I was on bed rest and restricted from exercise for a while, I'm not doing too bad. Because of that, I'm hoping I'll feel strong during delivery and bounce back quickly. Hopefully. With some luck as well.

18 weeks to go. 

Thursday, September 8, 2011

3 Things Thursday

1. I'm chubby. For some reason when I'm pregnant my thighs and hips and butt think, "HEY! We've got some extra weight to support so STORE THE FAT!!! DO IT NOW!!!!" Even though my tummy hasn't grown really in the last month so maternity shirts look stupid on me and my regular shirts are too short and tight and the maternity pants are falling off but I can't pull my regular pants up past my hips. Yeah, fun times. I'm 22 weeks now and feeling the little monster kick all the time. I just wish he'd stop kicking my bladder!

2. I'm getting antsy to run. It's been 4 months since I've really taken a run and I miss it. Especially since the weather has turned into PERFECT running weather. 55 degrees in the morning and very low humidity. Jealous of everyone. I'm gonna ask my Dr. at my October 3 appointment if I can do a 1 mile jog or something.

3. Since the weather has turned more towards fall, I'm contemplating all the crockpot meals I can make. Actually, I think about food all the time. Now that I'm not nauseous anymore I'm really dreaming about food. The only problem is that AFTER I eat, the food doesn't sit well. Really looking forward to those hospital meals - I'll feel good AFTER eating - I can't wait!